Life

Yes, there is hope!

/ hsoi / 2 Comments

Dinner is done.

The table needs cleaning off. The children are supposed to be cleaning, but are farting around and wrestling with each other. Wife is getting irritated. Yes the kids are all in a good mood, and we really don’t want to dampen it with Threat Of Dad® coming down upon them. So instead, I opt to bribe provide positive reinforcement to the children.

Ice cream.

Going out for it, no less. Wife requested a little peaceful time to herself, so I’ll happily take the kids away so she can have her Calgon moment.

I told the kids: clean the table and kitchen to Mom’s satisfaction, then tend to the litter box. You have 15 minutes. And I walked away.

These kids are moving. They set a timer. Oldest started delegating tasks. They are focused. They are cooperating. I just heard Oldest holler for Middle, “I need some help!” “OK, I’m coming.” Wow… no smart-assery, no belligerence, no nothing. Just the stuff that parental dreams are made of!! 🙂

I just heard “OK, we have 5 minutes left.”. I’m not sure, but it sounds like they are going above and beyond, cleaning even a bit more!! Are they wanting sprinkles on top of their ice cream? Oldest is barking orders. There’s no “You’re not the boss of me!” retort, just a simple “OK.” and obeying of the command. Wow….

Is it a bribe? Is it positive motivation? Call it whatever you want. I know the true power of this moment. You see, now I have tangible proof they are totally capable of working together, as a streamlined unit, cooperating, focused, efficient, on task, without back-talk, without fighting, without a need for Dad to intervene and put things back on course. Yes… yes I will hold this against them in the future. 🙂

And get this. 2 minutes left. They come in my office and give a successful report. So this is another thing… they can get things done early!  Man, they don’t realize how they’ve been set up… how high they just raised the bar for themselves. *insert diabolical fatherly laugh* 🙂

 

Updated: I should clarify, it’s not like my kids are normally misbehaved, disobedient, fight with each other, etc.. They’re actually quite well-behaved and do work well with each other. But, they are like any kid, they do have their sibling issues, they do have their moments of sheer jackassery. But still, tonight was sweet.

And sweet it was. I am still waiting for their Guinness ice cream to come back into rotation. A cup of that, some chocolate chunks crushed in. People I’m telling you there’s nothing finer. Had to settle (if you can call it that) for Mexican vanilla with fresh strawberries crushed in. Mmm.

Science remains in Texas, sorta.

/ hsoi

The Texas State Board of Education voted 7-7 on restoring a rule that “strengths and weaknesses” of all scientific theory be taught in public school science classes. The vote, failing to pass, means the doors to teaching creationism as scientific theory remain closed.

Frankly, I’m torn on this.

Should strengths and weakness be taught? Hell yes. Should evolution be taught? Hell yes. Should “creation stories” be taught? Hell yes. Should Intelligent Design be taught? Hell no. Allow me to explain.

In my opinion, Intelligent Design is a disingenuous concept. It’s not a scientific theory, it’s a religious effort masquerading as science in some sort of zealous effort to wedge Christian theology into the science classroom. I don’t appreciate this. Call it what it really is, present it for what it really is. Trying to do this really doesn’t win anyone over to your cause, since you’re twisting and lying. But hey, if you want to further this notion of “Intelligent Design” then you better talk about The Flying Spaghetti Monster as well.

Should we teach all approaches to how life, the Earth, the universe was created? Yes we should. Why? Because ultimately we don’t know. Every approach has as much chance to be wrong as the others. The more that we can know, the better off we can be. I personally find my life better off the greater variety I know about. Variety is the spice of life, right? We seem to dig 31 flavors, not 1 flavor, yes? And just because you can know about all 31 flavors, you can still favor just one of those flavors. So why can’t you know about how the ancient Egyptians viewed the creation of the world? What harm does that do? What help does that do?

I frankly think that if we’re going to provide people with an education, those people are better served by the more they can know. Too little knowledge can be dangerous, but I just don’t think too much knowledge being dangerous. So let them learn about Darwin. Let them learn about the Judeo-Christian creation stories. Let them learn how tribal cultures view things. Just let them learn. In this learning, present things as they are. You can present religious matters from a purely academic standpoint, although you do have to allow them to be treated academically. Present all possible theories, all possible stories, explore them, question them, seek to understand them and see how they fit into the greater human experience and deciphering of our great life mysteries. Let people learn…. freely, unabridged.

Little things

/ hsoi

I can’t remember where exactly I read this (and my Google-Fu is weak tonight), but I’m pretty sure it was either in Suzi’s blog or Ron’s blog. S or R was talking about little things and how wonderful they were. That time together didn’t have to mean going out on some extravagant date. One was saying how the other needed to go down to the corner store to put gas in the car and asked to go with. Sure it wasn’t an extravagant date, but it was time together. 

I shared that with The Wife and since then we’ve been doing little things like that. Walk down to the mailbox with each other. Walk around the block. Run a quick errand. Whatever works. We’re even doing it with the kids, Oldest, Middle, and Youngest. I need to run to the store, go with me. I need to fix the sink, come watch. You’re reading your book? I’m reading my book. Come sit next to me and let’s read together.

Sometimes lots of little things adds up to more than just a few large things, y’know?

Sugar, sweet sweet sugar

/ hsoi

The wife and kids went grocery shopping. They come home, I go downstairs to see what goodies have been brought.

Seems the kids talked my wife into buying Kool-Aid and mini marshmallows.

How do I know this?

I see the children… mixing a purple powder in a glass… then adding marshmallows on top of it.

So… we have sugar drink topped with fluffy sugar pellets.

I think it’s time for the kids to go outside and run a few hundred laps around the house, eh?

Unclear on the concept

/ hsoi / 2 Comments

My sons like to wear Skechers shoes. To update on the shoe shopping situation, it wound up that the shoes we ended up with ultimately weren’t going to work out… so off we went looking for other shoes. But at least we knew Oldest’s shoe size so why not order online, right? Mom & Oldest went looking online and found just the shoes he wanted. So on the 16th I ordered from skechers.com.

Days went by. I received no status update on the shipping of the shoes. That’s odd. Any eCommerce these days lets you know at most within 48 hours about status. Their website said it was in stock, that all is good… but yet by Friday I still had no idea if they were shipping or not (order status still said “processing”). So on Friday I phoned their customer service to ask. I was told that the shoe was out of stock (huh? what happened to that policy of 48 pairs of every shoe in stock?) and my order would automatically be cancelled soon. O…K…. I broke the news to Oldest and said we’d find the shoes somewhere else. 

Then the FedEx man arrived on Saturday with Oldest’s shoes. Hrm.

Then what did I get in my email inbox this morning? A message saying my order had been processed and here’s the FedEx tracking number. I checked the tracking number and apparently the order shipped out of their facility on the 18th.

Wow. 

They may have great shoes, but methinks there’s a lot of disconnect in their order processing system. Bug, not feature.

Use it or lose it

/ hsoi

I find our bodies to be amazing things. They naturally strive for preservation and efficiency.  You exercise and work hard for a long time to make physical gains, then you lay off for just a short while and all that work disappears. Our bodies strive to maintain just the level it needs, which is great, but frustrating when it takes so much time to gain and so little time to lose.

One area I see this is my legs, not just in strength but in endurance. In Kuk Sool we strive for low stances. This can look very nice when performing forms (especially on taller and thus longer legged and torsoed people), but moreso it’s a matter of training legs for strength and endurance. You don’t really fight in a low stance, but it’s a lot easier to duck via bending your knees when your legs are strong enough to allow you to do this.

I think what motivates me more than fighting, self-defense, or any sort of martial activity is growing older. I see people much older than me and even people my age, that just can’t get around. Getting off the couch is an effort. Picking something up off the floor is a strain, and they bend from their back then complain of back problems when they right themselves. They haven’t used their body, so they’ve lost it. I don’t want to be this way as I grow older. So, I do my best to just use my body fully in my daily life. If I need to pick something off the floor, I bend at the knees, either squatting or quasi-lunging to do so, but either way using the full range and ability of my body. If I need to stay down for a long time (e.g. scooping out the cat litter box), then I assume some sort of low horse stance while I do so… again, not being bent over at the back and feeling the lumbar pain as I’m down working for so long. Lifting a heavy object? Use the legs, baby. Things like this. Just ensuring that whatever I do in my daily life I do fully (other implications implied).

Doing such things in everyday life won’t turn my legs into something Tom Platz will fear, but it helps to keep my legs and body usable. As I said, the body likes to maintain just the level it needs, so my hope is if I continue to use my body every day at the level I wish to have when I’m 70 years old, hopefully when I get there I’ll still have it.

Easing them into life

/ hsoi / 1 Comment

My friend Ron stopped feeding one of his sons today.

I think it’s a great idea.

I hadn’t thought about doing this specific thing, but I’m going to add it to my agenda for my own kids. I have been allowing Oldest to make more of his own choices mistakes, which is good. He’s got enough knowledge and experience in his head to be given some free reign and jurisdiction over himself. We still guide him and sometimes we have to make the decision for him, but in the end the consequences (good and bad) are his to receive, and any mistakes are his to deal with.

I have felt that when 16 years old comes around, we won’t buy any of the kids a car. If they want a car, they pay for it. I might go in half with them, we’ll have to see how prices are. But things like gas, insurance, money for whatever fun they want to have… they have to get that on their own. Basically, if you want things in life, you gotta work for it and earn it. It’s how life is (or at least, is supposed to be), so get used to it.

Also once they can start to drive I want them to take at least one class at the local community college to get used to how they are. Again, easing them into the real world.

Anyway, thanx for the idea Ron. Good one.

A simple pleasure

/ hsoi

One thing I love about being home so much (side-benefit of the work-at-home situation) is my wife’s cooking.

Not just eating it and eating it 2-3 times a day, but smelling it.

I’ll be sequestered in my office. I’ll be deeply buried in code or debugging or some other software development joy. Then it hits me. Some smell… it has crept its way through the house. It might be the smell of garlic and onions sautéing. It might be bread baking. It might be the wonderful smell of bacon frying. Whatever it is, it’s always a wonderful smell. It’s always a pleasant surprise when it hits. Sometimes I’ll head down to the kitchen to see what’s cooking, other times I’ll just savor the aromas from afar and wait to see what else floats my way so I can try to figure out what she’s up to. 

The printer is in my office. I’ll hear it kick in without my initiation, so I know it’s Mrs. Hsoi printing out a recipe she found. I do my best to avoid looking at the printout. I don’t want to know. I don’t want the surprise to be ruined. Let her cook. Let the clues waft my way. The simple please of deciphering the magic she’s performing in the kitchen.

I am a fortunate man. 🙂

Updated: You know how I know my wife reads my blog? I post this. I go get in the shower. I come out of the shower and smell… bacon. Sweet sweet thick cut smoky fatty bacon. She received the above subtle hint.

My wife is awesome.

Ah, kids

/ hsoi / 1 Comment

The neighbor kids are over, playing with my kids. The joys of Spring Break and nothing for them to do all day, eh?

They all have their Nerf guns out. In the hallway. Outside my office. Setting up barricades. Plotting strategy. Choosing teams.

I hear them talking about each other’s Nerf blaster.

“How much capacity does yours have?”

“A lot.”

Sounds of “rack, click, pop” as suction cup darts go whizzing about, sticking to the walls and windows.

I’m all tempted to go down and start to show them some tactics, but I know it’ll be instantly uncool for me to do so. 😉

 

BTW, today’s Nerf blasters are pretty awesome.

 

Update: I come downstairs. The kids are now outside playing, but evidence of their past exploits remain. Three guesses whose “compound” this was.

Emergency, by Neil Strauss

/ hsoi

My buddy Ron has his review of the new Neil Strauss book, Emergency, up on his blog.

After reading the review, I’m not sure I’ll buy the book. It seems it’s not what I expected it to be (tho I did suspect it might be the way that it went). It’s the sort of thing where I’m not going to blindly order from Amazon, but instead I’ll try to find it at a local bookstore and flip through before I decide. Still, it’s cool that he wrote the book that he did.