Philosophy

Humility may save your life

/ hsoi / 1 Comment

I train in an empty hand martial art. I train with guns. Some would say I have a greater ability than the average citizen to hurt other people and perhaps end their life. And there’s no question, when you start to learn these things you get a big confidence boost in your ability to take care of yourself. Unfortunately, ego can get in the way… and you can get over-confident, and that could get you killed.

Over-confidence can lead to a false sense of what your skills and abilities actually are. Over-confidence might lead you to make choices, especially in the heat of the moment, that turn out to be less than correct and could lead you into greater trouble. And worse? Being over-confident might lead you to be arrogant, and that could lead to you getting your ass handed to you.

What is the point of self-defense? To come out alive with as little injury as possible. A realistic humility aids in this endeavor. If I know it’s a bad part of town, while perhaps I could take care of myself just fine, why should I even put myself in that situation in the first place? If there’s no need to go there, don’t. There we go, I’ve just defended myself, came out alive, no injury to myself. I didn’t let my ego get in the way with a “I’m going to go there, and if any punk tries to mess with me I’m going to fuck him up good!” sort of mentality — that’s more than likely just going to get me in trouble.

Realize as well that just because you have those particular skills doesn’t mean you have to use them. It’s the old “you have a hammer so everything looks like a nail” problem. I recall my first “force-on-force” scenario. I had a (fake) gun, I felt like I had to use it (it’s a gun class after all, right?). But in fact, that was the wrong answer; the best answer was to just call the police and avoid putting myself in a potentially dangerous situation. It was a humbling experience. Yes, my ego felt really bruised to have gotten the answer so wrong. I wanted to rationalize, I wanted to make excuses, I wanted to save face. But that’s the wrong way to go about it because I wouldn’t learn. Better to make the mistake in a forgiving environment and learn from it. The experience was humbling in and of itself, and by accepting my mistake in a humble manner, it’s a lesson that’s stuck with me and I’d like to hope I’m a little better off for it.

If someone opts to get in your face for something stupid, just apologize. Back off. Yield. Take on a submissive posture (tho still have the mental preparation and wherewithal to respond should the situation turn ugly). Even if you were wrong, still apologize. What’s more important? Being right? Or being alive and uninjured? This isn’t to say be wishy-washy, it’s to say you should be smart, you should be wise, and you should maximize the course of action that allows you to stay alive and unharmed. Don’t let your ego, your testosterone, your fantasy, your false sense of honor, get in the way and get you hurt.

Be humble. Yield. Knowing how to yield is strength (Tao Te Ching 52). Ponder Tao Te Ching 59:

The generals have a saying:
“Rather than make the first move
it is better to wait and see.
Rather than advance an inch
it is better to retreat a yard.”

This is called
going forward without advancing,
pushing back without using weapons.

There is no greater misfortune
than underestimating your enemy.
Underestimating your enemy
means thinking that he is evil.
Thus you destroy your three treasures
and become an enemy yourself.

When two great forces oppose each other,
the victory will go
to the one that knows how to yield.

Free Speech 101

/ hsoi / 1 Comment

Lissa talks about “free speech” on college campuses.

Yeah, I remember those days too, much the same way she does.

You see, that wonderful little “first amendment” mention of “free speech” is there precisely to protect unpopular speech. We don’t need to protect the speech everyone is ok with, we need to protect the speech that some folks might have trouble with. 

As I’ve said before, “Freedom is something we must give to others if we wish it for ourselves.” So if you want “free speech”, you have to let others have free speech, even if it’s speech you don’t want to hear.

A Zen Moment in Parenting

/ hsoi / 2 Comments

This is a great little parenting story.

First, I think the situation was handled perfectly. Sure he could have taken the simple route and spanked the kid, or “time-out”,  or grounded him, but that really wouldn’t directly address the problem. I often find it’s better to address the problem in a manner directly related to the problem. Denying the Xbox for a week wouldn’t address this problem. He was able to help his child see himself, discover his own problem, and correct his problem on his own. All the parent did was be patient and guide.

It’s tough to get people to change by forcing them to change; they’re not necessarily going to change for you. The more successful route to get someone to change is for them to change themselves. It’s tougher for you to do, you really have to take a different tack and approach in guiding them to see things for themselves, but often that’s how things tend to work best.

Of course, there are some things that folks are so emotionally tied up into that getting them to see reason is quite difficult. But just because it may be difficult for you to do doesn’t mean the other person is a lost cause or that it’s not worth making the effort to try. Patience. Devotion.

Going fast

/ hsoi / 3 Comments

Rob Leatham is one of the top competitive handgun shooters. In his blog he has an article about shooting fast, and he’s certainly one that knows that area well. While Rob’s article tilts towards the gaming/competition aspect of shooting, the fundamentals apply to any sort of activity, not just shooting.

Shooting fast is about shooting at the highest level of your ability, and that isn’t to say that you can’t raise your highest level even higher through practice and work. But speed that’s sloppy? That’s not speed. You have to be correct. You have to be accurate.

A few weeks ago when I was down in Houston for a black belt test, one of the things Master Alex spoke to us about was being fast, but sloppy fast isn’t fast, it’s just sloppy. One of the 5 principles of forms is “hands fast” but you must be correct, you must be accurate, you must be crisp and clean, then also be fast… never so fast as to lose those other aspects.

Remember years ago when the Pentium processor had floating point calculation errors? Back then it was a wicked fast chip, but I started saying “No one cares about the first person to get the wrong answer.” Fast may be important, but correct is more important. 

Ever have a group of kids, you ask them a question and there’s always those that shoot their hands up first, maybe before you even finished asking the question? Then you call on those kids and many times they don’t have the answer… they just wanted to be fast and first. 

So you see, it doesn’t matter what the realm is: shooting, martial arts, computers, or just life. Yes, being fast and first is important, but I would say being correct/accurate is more important. Slow down, work to be correct, work to be smooth. Speed will come.

Intolerance and Obama.

/ hsoi / 4 Comments

Wow. (h/t to Rob)

But this level of massive intolerance doesn’t really surprise me. I’ve found those that scream about tolerance to be some of the most intolerant. Their definition of “tolerance” means that you tolerate what they want you to tolerate. Their definition of “open-mindedness” means you agree with what they agree with. Their definition of “good” is what they deem to be good. If you’re not with them, you are against them.

I’ve said it before, I’ll say it again.

Freedom is something we must give to others if we wish it for ourselves.

If you want tolerance, you must first be tolerant. If you want people to be open-minded to your opinions and ideas, you must first be open-minded to theirs. If you want good in the world, you must first accept what others consider good.

Another tip? Try to not be so hateful, especially towards those you feel “deserve” some scorn or hate. A little love, a little forgiveness, a little true understanding, a little humility… they go a long way.

On abortion and freedom

/ hsoi

I was reading this article this morning that motivated me to finally write on this matter. But it’s a matter that’s been on my mind for some time. I’m not writing on this being a moral or religious issue for me, but rather an issue of freedom.

You see, I used to believe in being “pro-choice,” and in some regards I still do. There is no eliminating abortion from society, so keeping it safe is better than letting it go illegal. Of course, perhaps if it was illegal it might stave things off, but look at how our “War Against Drugs” is working and you’ll realize that being illegal doesn’t really stop things and instead can create a whole host of other problems. But whereas someone consuming drugs ultimately only affects themselves, abortion does directly affect someone else: that unborn child, even if at the time of the abortion it’s little more than a clump of cells. And thus, I still have a lot of inner debate about the issue. There’s moral conflicts, Libertarian conflicts, legal issues, ideal issues, practical issues….

But one thing I can see clearly is infringement upon freedom: this so-called “Freedom of Choice Act”. I fail to see where there’s any freedom of choice. If a doctor is forced to give an abortion on-demand, where is there any freedom of choice for that doctor? If a hospital is forced to provide services that go against their moral and religious backing (many hospitals have religious affiliation) and if they refuse to provide abortion services they lose Federal money and thus can no longer operate and serve the greater community… where is the freedom of choice in that, not only for the hospital but for the larger community now without a hospital? If you as a taxpayer now must fund an activity you find wrong, because you cannot choose to not pay your taxes nor how your tax money is spent, where is the freedom of choice in that?

Freedom is something we must give to others if we wish it for ourselves.

To take freedom from one to allow freedom for another, that is not true freedom. To force one against their moral grain for the benefit of another, that is not true freedom. To force one to subsidize another, that is not freedom. To use the force of law to inflict your beliefs upon the entire nation, that is not freedom. To grow the power of government, to allow it more control over my body, my conscience, my life, that is not freedom.

Folks, if you really want freedom of choice, make sure that what you work for will truly provide that. No, it won’t be easy, no it won’t be something quick to come up with, and yes we must come to accept that the choices of some may not be the same choices we would make for ourselves but those choices are theirs to make and they will receive the consequences (good or bad) of their choices. Freedom does require you to think and act self-less-ly, not selfishly. If you really want to live in world where you are free to choose in whatever you think, say, or do, make sure your efforts ensure others — especially those that stand in opposition to you — remain free as well. Anything less is not true freedom.

Keepin’ on

/ hsoi

I’ve always found Xavier’s blog to be filled with good stuff… one of the better blogs overall out there.

Yesterday he writes about “On Keeping On Keeping On” and I have to agree with him. One reason I became an NRA Certified Instructor was to help people learn about firearms. I changed, I know others can too. It’s difficult to preach change to a large group and expect change to happen, but working one-on-one with folks you can speak directly to their needs, address their concerns. I won’t lie, I don’t bullshit; honesty is the only way to go about things. I’ll do my best to avoid politics, but there’s inheriently a political component to this. Still, by going one-on-one you can gauge the audience and tailor the message best (e.g. you can avoid politics unless asked; if they’re for sport, you can go that route; if they’re for self-defense you can go that route; etc.). If at the end of it all they’re not going to “see it my way” that’s ok… at least if they were willing to engage in the conversation, and that’s something. That they were willing to let a seed be sown, even if it doesn’t sprout today, maybe it will sometime later.

We cannot hold a grudge. We cannot let our anger be our driving force, especially if it closes us off. Not only does that make us look bad, but it won’t help bring new people into the fold. Think about it. If a sheep sees an angry dog bearing big teeth, it doesn’t matter if that angry dog is a wolf or a sheepdog — it’s still a big predator with teeth that the sheep is going to be afraid of and avoid. So you sheepdogs, think about how to win the trust of those sheep. How to better present yourself, how to better and honestly gain their trust and realize that we’re The Good Guys. And perhaps, just perhaps, be able to teach those sheep how to show some teeth as well.

Self-Defense for all

/ hsoi / 5 Comments

I’m in my mid-30’s. I’m a big guy (6’3″, 200#). I’m strong. I’m physically fit. I actively practice an empty-hand martial art.

One might argue that I’m able to take care of myself should someone attack me. Why should I need a gun to defend myself? Just knock ’em out with my fists or subdue them with a hold or something, right? Of course, that assumes that anyone would mess with big ugly me in the first place…. no one should mess with me, I don’t look like an easy target. Well, assumptions are fine, and I’m sure if I come across as food to some predator that I don’t come across as an easy target. But when there’s a pack of jackals about, they can take down a lion. Your biggest, baddest sport fighters lose a match now and again. No one is immune. But for the sake of argument, let’s say I am because of my state.

Is the world filled with people like me? No, not really. 

Look at Kellene. She admits to being 200 pounds, 5′ 2.5″, and out of shape. Does she not have a right to defend herself?

How about disabled folks? I see folks on motorized wheelchairs buzzing around town, but I always wonder what stops some degenerate from taking advantage of them?

How about the elderly? Is a big and fit 19 year old attacking a 75 year old man with a cane, hip replacement, and pacemaker really a fair fight?

Perhaps you could argue I don’t need a gun because I’m fairly equal or dominant by myself alone. I wouldn’t agree, because I know wolves travel in packs, because I am not so arrogant and blind as to think I’m invincible and “it could never happen to me”. What I would like you to explain to me how and why the above people, who don’t have the same advantages I do, should be denied an equalizer. Why should they be relegated to be weakened prey? Are their lives not important? They have every right to self-defense.

Rare act of sportsmanship?

/ hsoi / 1 Comment

Via Xavier, I read about this “rare act of sportsmanship“. Yeah… you’ll want some tissue.

The story itself was wonderful. But is this a rare act of sportsmanship? I don’t think so. I think it’s just an act of sportsmanship (and in this case, a very awesome act of sportsmanship). What might make it rare is that we don’t hear about such things all the time. Look at the news. What do we hear about? It’s all negative, ugly, hateful, shitty things that are going on in the world. You hear it over and over, you start to think it’s the way things are. The thing is, it’s only a small slice of what’s going on in a day. Most of what goes on in a day are good things. And they’re little things, but they add up.

For example, yesterday at my black belt testing I’m walking from the parking lot to the building. I see also coming to the door at the same time are a couple people carrying a large tub of something (probably equipment) and they’re rather burdened down, no way they’ll navigate the door themselves. So I hustle up and hold the door open for them. Then as I’m holding the door, I offer to let other people in as well, but they stop and insist instead that they hold the door for me and I go first. Sure it’s a small thing — certainly not some newsworthy event — but it’s those small things, those small acts of kindness that matter. 

Just because you hear it on the news over and over doesn’t mean the world is a horrible ugly place. The media makes their money off being ugly, perhaps relegating 30 seconds at the end of a broadcast to some “feel good” story… and so your balance and outlook gets skewed. The world is mostly filled with good people doing good things in a day. Turn off the fucking TV, and get out and look at the world around you. Stop letting TV and other media shape your worldview: go shape your own based on getting out and immersing yourself in a life of your own. Force yourself to have a more positive filter and outlook on life. You might just discover good things aren’t so rare.

Nancy Pelosi and The Pope

/ hsoi / 2 Comments

So I read by way of Robbie that Nancy Pelosi and The Pope had a meeting. I’m glad to hear this happened.

My wife is a devout Catholic so abortion topics, including Pelosi’s take on it, are a topic of conversation from time-to-time around our household. I don’t want to talk about abortion here so much as I want to talk about integrity and consistency. If you believe in abortion and have all of your other beliefs, ideology, philosophy, outlook on life, behavior, etc. all in line with each other, that’s one thing. But along comes Nancy Pelosi saying she’s “an ardent practicing Catholic”, but then supports abortion. Folks, that doesn’t jive. She goes on to say that the Catholic Church doesn’t even know when life begins! Watch her say this and read the transcript yourself.

Frankly, I don’t see why The Pope doesn’t deny Holy Communion to her or any other Catholic that behaves in this manner. It’s simple. If you’re a Catholic, you adhere to a certain set of beliefs. If you don’t adhere to those beliefs, you’re not a Catholic… especially not an “ardent practicing” one. This is a matter of integrity.

I think Robbie said it best tho:

Ms. Pelosi says she’s a Catholic. But she also supports abortion. Which makes her a pretty shitty Catholic. Kind of like every single professed Catholic who voted for Obama (who in turn voted to allow the murder of babies born alive that were supposed to be “terminated” before birth).