Life

You don’t have a choice. Well, actually you do.

/ hsoi / 4 Comments

You don’t have a choice.

When you were rear-ended at the stoplight? You didn’t have a choice in the matter — you were the unfortunate recipient of the fender-bender.

When the teenager was more concerned with texting than driving and t-boned you? You didn’t have a choice.

When the drunk-driver veered across the double-yellow line and smashed head-on into your car, you didn’t have a choice.

Actually, you did have some degree of choice, and you likely exercised it. The moment you got in the car, you chose to buckle your seatbelt. In fact, you may have exercised some greater choice prior to driving the car. When you bought the car, you may well have researched things like the crash ratings and other safety features of the car, and chose your purchase at least in part based upon the car’s safety features.

We accept that life has risk. When we get into our car, we accept that risk. We may not consciously think about that risk every day, and we may only buckle up out of habit, but it’s a pretty good habit to be in if the statistics are correct and there’s a 1 in 84 chance of you dying from a car accident.

We buckle up not because we expect to be in an accident, but because we understand it can happen. If we could expect it, if we knew it was going to happen, why would we go there in the first place? Why wouldn’t we avoid it to the fullest extent of our capabilities? But since we can’t know when, since we can’t know where, and since we cannot choose when or where it will happen, since it takes us by surprise, since we have no choice, we take measures so that if it does happen, we can improve our chances of coming out on the other side alive.

No one considers you paranoid for taking steps to preserve your life. No one asks you what you’re afraid of. That’s because they understand that such things happen, and your actions are wise towards the preservation of your life.

When I put on my gun in the morning, it’s not because I’m afraid of anything. It’s not because I’m paranoid. It’s because I understand that violent crime happens. Rough numbers are what? about 1 in 250 of being the victim of a violent crime in the US? It’s not too far fetched that in your lifetime you’ll be the victim of a violent crime.

When that crime occurs, you won’t have a choice. You don’t get to choose when it will happen. You don’t get to choose where. Some people decide they’ll carry their gun when they go here but not there. Why? Is “there” somehow invulnerable? and if “here” is bad enough that you know you need a gun, why are you going there in the first place?

Some just want a gun in the car, in the glove compartment. What good does that do when you’re attacked while in the parking lot (which is where many victimizations occur). Again, you didn’t get any say in when or where you’d get attacked.

It’s important to accept that bad things happen that you have no control over. You get no say, you have no choice. But there are aspects where you can have a say, and where you can choose. When you make these choices, you don’t do them out of fear or paranoia, you do them out of acceptance of life’s risks. You do them because you understand the realities of life, that “shit happens”, and the more you can do to deflect the shit, the better your chances are of continuing your good life. It’s why we always buckle up when we get in the car, and it’s why some of us chose to carry a gun… always.

Flooding around Austin

/ hsoi

Austin got nailed by some wicked storms yesterday. On the one hand, awesome, because we are sorely in need of rain. On the other hand, not so awesome because the lack of rain has made the ground really hard so downpours like that tend to run off and flood.

Live in Austin? wondering if roads are closed due to flooding? The city has a pretty cool interactive map with information on road closures and status due to flooding: ATX Floods.

zoominfo – FAIL

/ hsoi / 2 Comments

I’ve never used zoominfo.com before. Sometimes I turn to Google because it’s a better search engine that my blog’s local engine, and I can find past articles much faster.

A few days ago when doing that, ZoomInfo’s entry for me came up in the listings. I took a screenshot:

Click to embiggen.

There is so much FAIL.

In some ways it is right. Those web references are obviously about me. Many are old, but they are right links. So it makes some sense that it associates me as “Assistant Instructor” and with KR Training.

I’m not sure why it thinks I’m in Wyoming (307 area code)

I don’t know what that email address is. Probably bogus, because it’s kinda reasonable to expect it’d be “john” @ “something” .com, because .com is common enough.

And the address is all kinds of screwed up.

I have no interest in correcting the information, joining ZoomInfo, etc..

But I guess folks should be quite skeptical of the data you receive from it, if you even consider using it. This is no slight or slander. It’s just honest truth because the above doesn’t have much right about me.

If you could give me one piece of advice…

/ hsoi / 12 Comments

…about running a small business, what would it be?

I know other small-business-owners and entrepreneurs read my blog. So if there is one thing you can share with me from your experience, please do.

A lesson learned.

A mistake made (and how to not repeat it).

A wise principle.

A guiding concept.

Whatever it might be, towards helping one achieve success.

For example, Michael Lazerow says the #1 mistake entrepreneurs make?

…FOCUSING ON THE WRONG THINGS.

Successful entrepreneurs focus exclusively on efforts that matter and are able to tune out the rest. People who focus succeed. It’s that simple.

So, what can you teach me? I’m ready to listen. Please add a comment.

Found More Canes

/ hsoi / 2 Comments

I’m a fan of canes, because they can be a useful self-defense tool in addition to being a walking aid. And let’s be honest… while we would like to always carry a gun, we can’t. Gotta get on an airplane? Carrying a gun isn’t going to happen. There’s just times when you have to look for alternative solutions. I think a cane is pretty tough to beat.

It probably stems from my martial arts study years ago in Kuk Sool and Hapkido. From day one, the cane was the weapon that appealed to me most because it was most practical. A sword isn’t going to cut it (pun intended) these days. A short stick (dan bong) actually can be pretty useful and have wide application, but it’s short: it’s a close-in weapon. A cane is about 3′ long, and useful at a slight distance and at helping to maintain some space. There are other weapons, but in many regards aren’t feasible or practical. Cane works, and will always be available and with us.

In my quest for a good cane, I finally found one a few years ago. While good, it wasn’t exactly what I wanted. But certainly it got me through. Nevertheless, my eyes were always open for another cane.

A couple months ago one came along.

When we were headed out for a family day, we stopped into the Bastrop Buc-ee’s. Wandering around the store, saw a container of canes and dug through them. Found this one.

There was no identifying tag on it, so I cannot say for certain the make/model/manufacturer, but I can say it looks a LOT like the Twisted Oak Walking Cane from Brazos Walking Sticks. I couldn’t be surprised if that was the case, given how it was being sold. It was a similar setup to my first cane, and given all I discovered when I looked up my first cane well… it seems to be in line there.

What I liked about this was the almost straight shaft. The twist? Looks neat, and adds some hurt. I also liked how the crook was a bit more open in the neck area, and yes this hooks around limbs and necks much more easily. The fact the end/butt doesn’t extend too far either also is welcome for ease of hooking and releasing. Oak, so it’s strong. Really, I’m thrilled with this. It’s not perfect, but it’s good.

A few weeks ago we went to the Sherwood Forest Faire. Wife and Kiddos sat down to get ready for a show to start, and I looked behind me and saw a vendor selling canes, walking sticks, and other such things. Turns out they are Lady Mac’s Horns, Canes, and Staffs. Alas, I cannot find any sort of website for them, but if you search you’ll find them referenced on other “Ren Faire” websites and forums. I saw some gorgeous work there, including one cane with a thick and beautifully crafted mesquite shaft topped with an elk antler “handle”; if I needed a full-time cane for walking, I would have bought it in an instant. I actually saw only one crook-neck cane, and I couldn’t resist trying it out…. and yes, buying it:

This cane is made of hickory, and I loved the “unfinished” look with the bark still on. The shaft is as straight as it can be, given it’s attempting to look more natural. Really, it’s pretty straight but yet has just enough “kink and bend” to be interesting. It’s also slightly thicker than the other two canes… and that’s why I think I like it more.

See, there’s something about the shaping of the handle, where your palm actually rests. I tried to capture a picture of it but couldn’t get one that did it justice. They have to shave the wood down some to make the bend, but here they didn’t shave too much. Plus they shaped the top of the handle to be round but just a hair flatter… it’s slightly more oblique than circular. All that shaping, combined with the slightly thicker wood? It feels just awesome in the hand, and is very comfortable to walk with. Makes sense, because now you are spreading weight over a greater area.

The crook is a little tighter, but still hooks around necks. In some regard it’s a difference between a “practice cane” and a “street cane”, if you will. That is, with a practice cane you want to be polite to your partner, so a larger, more open crook is desired. With a “street cane”, you aren’t as concerned with politeness to your attacker. If I had to classify, I’d say the twisted oak cane above is more “practice” and this hickory is more “street”. Regardless, it’s certainly more comfortable to walk with.

Here’s a close-up of the three cane neck/crook areas:

L-R: #3, Lady Mac; #2 twisted oak; #1 first cane

This picture should give you a better idea. You can see with cane #2 that it’s rather open at the neck as well as very straight of shaft. #3 is a little tighter in terms of the hook and length. #1 is even longer.. and if you can see, there’s a little “hump” at the top of the crook and the wood is very thin — it’s no where near as comfortable to walk with as #3.

Anyways, #3 is my current go-to. But since I’m building a little collection, I need to find a way to store them all. Thinking about ideas, because I suspect more canes will be in my future.

Unintended Consequences

/ hsoi / 3 Comments

Austin just put a plastic bag ban in place.

Seattle has a bag ban. Some laud the “positive environmental impact”. Others lament the high increase in shoplifting and the massive losses it’s causing.

I’ve spoken with numerous people in Austin, and many are going to stop shopping in Austin, instead shopping in surrounding communities. The City of Austin adds a 2% sales tax on top of the state’s sales tax. It might be interesting to see what sales tax revenue looks like in a few months.

Tourism revenue will be interesting to watch as well.

SXSW starts now, the first major event to happen post-ban. I’ll be curious what those visitors to the city think. Oh sure, they are likely a demographic that will applaud such a move… but then mutter or complain under their breath, lest they look “unhip” to everyone.

I understand the good intentions behind this latest brick in the road, but like most “bans”, they never really achieve the goals the originators expect but instead tend to have a lot of unintended and undesirable side-effects.

Never be afraid to fail

/ hsoi / 2 Comments

In an old article, Jim Wendler lists 10 nuggets of wisdom. While they’re all good, #5 stands out:

5. One of the best things I ever learned in football (and this was a big turning point for me in college) was to never be afraid to fail. This paralysis keeps too many people from trying – keeps people from doing their first meet, submitting their first article, or asking out the girl you’ve had a crush on for two years.

Emphasis added.

As I’ve gotten (much) older, my fear of failure has decreased. Because yes, it caused me to miss opportunities in life, be it fun events, career opportunities, ways to improve life, or yes… that girl. 🙂

I’m sure you can look back on your own life and see how fear of failure held you back. In fact, I can still see places in my life where the little demon creeps in; I’m working on that.

This would be something to tell my younger self, and so I must tell my children – don’t be afraid to fail.

If you’re not strong, you’re weak

/ hsoi

At a certain point as a lifter and athlete, as a worker or professional, as a business owner or a husband, father, or lover, we will come to the choice of staying comfortable in being good enough in our current state, or choosing discomfort in trying to be more. Some people are satisfied with just doing enough and no more than that. We are not those people, though.

…

This drive we have for strength is a choice. At some point in our relationship with lifting, we chose strength. We didn’t choose maintenance, we didn’t choose just being healthy, and we didn’t choose mediocrity. We are not satisfied with simply maintaining what we have but instead work to become more than what we currently are. We made a choice not to be weak; we would be strong.

Whether we realize it or not, this separates us from the vast majority of the population—not just people that go to gyms, but the general untrained population as well. How many people spend weeks, months, and years training themselves to be better? How many people wake up every day and ask themselves, “am I stronger than I was yesterday?” Most do not.

– Alexander Cortes, “Strength is a Choice“

Sure he’s talking about powerlifting, but strength is more than physical muscle. Making yourself better goes beyond iron.

Commitments and Priorities

/ hsoi

I saw the above image posted to the DangerouslyHardcore Facebook page. In case the image goes away it says:

Commitment means staying loyal to what you said you were going to do long after the mood you said it in has left you.

Very true.

I’ve had a bunch of things rolling in my head for a while, and seeing the above image/text along with something that happened in Wife’s life a few days ago… it changed my priorities regarding my commitments.

I had committed to being more involved in shooting competitions, like IDPA. That’s going down the priority ladder.

I had committed to working on a new iPhone app. This commitment was made some time ago, work started, but has been treading water for too many months. This is going up the priority ladder.

I only have so much time and energy. The app went down the ladder because after staring at the computer all day and busting my ass all week for the day job, I just didn’t have the desire to look at the computer any more. I was (am) drained. Other things went up the priority ladder because they were not-computer things. They gave me something else to do, something else to occupy my mind and energy. Plus they were things that needed attention.

Well… the lack of app commitment also strikes a little closer because this particular app project is very personal. It’s something I’m doing with Wife, and it means a lot to her. That I haven’t been able to give it the attention it’s due is not right, and I feel horrible. It’d be one thing to not honor the commitment to myself, or to anyone else. But to not honor this commitment to my wife? That’s not right, and that hurts me deeply. It wasn’t not honored out of malice or anything bad, just exhaustion. I need to do something about it.

And in some regard, the mood for the app has left me. It’s mostly because I’ve been away, had too many false restarts, and it’s just hard to get motivated yet yet yet again. But I know once I truly get back into it, I’ll roll along alright. I need to rediscover my commitment, and see it through.

So, since much of my “free time” is on the weekends, that means I need to spend it working on this app.

That means shooting matches is out, for now. I don’t expect the app will take me all year to do, so I reckon later this year I should be able to make it out to matches. As well, so long as I keep dry firing at home and regularly shooting, like when I go out to KRT to teach, that’s alright. I mean, if I can run through a few magazines, run a few drills, assess state of things, then go home and dry fire to bring up the skill, then go back and shoot to measure progress, really, that’s OK. That will hold me for now. That I’m just shooting live at least once a month is well, about what shooting competition would be. Granted, there isn’t any of the pressure or environment, but this is the trade-off for now while I live up to my more important commitment. I just have to keep up with dry fire and ensuring I put at least a mag or two through the gun (for myself, with purpose) when I go out to teach.

I’m not abandoning my commitment to shooting competition, just changing course a bit. I have to, because Wife is more important. 🙂  And hopefully it brings other commitments back, like more regular dry fire and practice.

I can only look at this as a good thing, as long as I remain committed. 🙂

Feeling safe vs. Being safe

/ hsoi

I could lay a strip of fabric across your shoulder while you drive a car. That might make you feel safe, since it would feel like a seat belt and look like a seat belt, but it wouldn’t actually make you safe because it’s not really a seat belt and will not work like one if the car crashed.

I could stamp the words “air bag” onto pieces of the car’s dashboard, but leave the space behind the dashboard empty. You’ll have an illusion of safety, but no real safety.

Seeing a fire extinguisher hanging on the wall is nice, but unless it’s the right type (e.g. ABC), full and functional (you did check the valve? you did inspect it at least yearly, right?) it won’t be much use when you need it.

I frequently see expressions of a “need to feel safe”. That this feeling trumps measures that actually provide true safety. I don’t understand this line of thinking because you’d rather have a measure that makes you feel safe but doesn’t actually make you safe, instead of a measure that actually would make you safe which would naturally also provide the feeling of safety (and the confidence of that knowledge). Both steps give you the feeling of safety, but only one actually makes you safe in the face of danger. Why choose the illusion over the reality?

This isn’t just about guns, so please don’t get hung up there. We could apply this to the TSA. We could apply this to “self defense” programs, including most martial arts. We can apply this to products in our homes. We can apply this to our homes and neighborhoods. We can apply this to laws and regulations. Really, it’s about a concept that can be applied throughout life. Step back and think about it. Be honest with yourself, and be willing to admit if you are holding on to an illusion. It’s good to follow dreams, but it can be unhealthy to cling to illusions.